Reputation: Pizza Box.

I'm not going to lie. I love Pizza. I think it's best thing to ever be created. Bread with stuff on it, good stuff, oh heaven.

In admitting I love Pizza, I will also admit that I eat it a lot. In fact when I am in school I am usually to busy to realize what food I have stocked in my fridge. More often than not, all that lingers in the tall cold box is condiments and expired condiments!

VARIETY!

Instead of going to town on a jar of mayonnaise with a spoon I opt to order my favorite meal. Pizza! Usually covered in meat, usually accompanied with bread sticks and if available, dips! The euphoria I experience when it arrives is sheer happiness. Then quickly I turn into a raging beast ready to rip apart its prey. I can't tear the box open fast enough. I select the piece closest to me and sloppily extract it and drop it on my plate. I savagely eat it and then go back for more and more. I'm sure if the pizza were a living creature the screams and terror it belts from it's cardboard casing would be heart wrenching and disturbing. I wouldn't care though cause I have warm delicious pizza!!!

The eating of the pizza is quite atrocious as well, I won't describe it, but let's just say I am glad no one can see me eat while alone in the comfort of my own home. It's disgusting. I'm sure people would rather see me eat that mayonnaise with a spoon (goes well with paprika).

The reason for writing this blog is because I have garnered a certain reputation around my apartment building. A reputation I only became aware of recently. A tenant was hosting a little new years get together for everyone in the building. I decided to go cause I was sure there'd be food. I'm not particularly close with any of my neighbours, so they probably knew why I was there. Plus the fact I was mostly hanging out by the snack table. Also mostly because I ate all the oysters wrapped in bacon and people were upset, whatever, it's not my fault people rather waste their time conversing when they can be gorging shamelessly beside a snack table. Plus I left once the food was gone, so I'm a little obvious...shoot me.

Anyways, when I was full and waiting to binge on seconds some neighbours started to talk to me about my schooling. There is nothing I love more than food and talking about me, so I was willing to answer what ever they wanted to know. I told them I was getting my degree in Creative Writing and was asked what sort of writing I would prefer to do. Before I could say anything someone chimed into the conversation,

"You can write about the vast assortment of pizza!"

The room erupted into laughter and I sat there with a stupid grin of confusion on my face. I followed up their laughter with a,

"whaaaat?"

In which I was then informed that I have a reputation among everyone in the building. I am known as 'Pizza Box'. They call me 'Pizza Box' because the vast majority of the pizza boxes stacked outside in the recycling bins belong to me. I wasn't sure how I felt about that. Being given a reputation I had no idea I had acquired. I felt a little embarrassed and as if I had to explain myself to everyone until one woman said,

"I envy you. I wish I could eat that much bread and still stay skinny."

That's all I needed to know, that someone envied me and all was well. So they may call me 'Pizza Box'. Let my reputation be known. I will eat you under the table (suggestive?) when it comes to pizza and I am proud of it!

Until then,

DJ Wr1t3r